I had all of these beliefs about our little family taking shape. I always imagined the things we would do as a family and could picture the three of us together – before Gus ever started cooking.
Lately I have been feeling bad about this. We didn’t go camping this summer. We’re not doing enough activities. Are we playing enough? We aren’t hiking. We aren’t at all the family I imagined us being.
Then I realized that when I imagined this family it was never with a baby but instead with a four year old. Of course we are not doing all those things. It is 95 degrees. We’re trying to get Gus down to two naps. We’re really fucking tired.
I’ve decided the first year of your kids life is basically a wash. You do some fun stuff but you’re also just tired and I just accepted the fact we’ll do more fun stuff later. I’ll let Lesley start a garden again next year since I have grand dreams of Gus in it even though our garden this year is so so pathetic. We’ll go camping next year. We’ll hike a bit more. And each year we’ll do a bit more.
So if you are feeling this way, too – you get a pass. Next year you can be the parent you dream of being.
And here is my kid, because he is cute: